Cuitlacoche

Our next journey takes us to Mexico, where we will delve into the language of food delicacies. In Mexico, the word for "yummy" is "Cuitlacoche" (kweet-lah-KOH-chay).

It's infected corn.

Since the time of the Aztecs, the fungus Ustilago maydis, also known as corn smut, maize mushroom, or huitlacoche, has infected and transformed perfectly normal corn into this:


That's right. They meant to do that. The Sneeze described opening a can of Cuitlacoche and tasting it:

In just a single serving, you'll experience a wide array of textures. Without getting too gross, it's because the disease is more advanced in some kernels than others. One bite might be kinda chewy, while the next might burst in your mouth like a black pus-filled blister.

Sound good?


When's the last time you ate something that looked like that? On purpose? Be honest, because I don't think that putting frogs in blenders is a common practice these days.

The large, bulbous things that look like frog eyes are corn kernels that have swollen to enormous size from fungal spores inside.

Enthusiasts report the taste of cuitlacoche to be a smoky-sweet mixture of corn and mushrooms. Not sure if I'd want to find out.

Right now, the only fungi I eat are mushrooms, beer, and bread. That's right. Beer and bread contain fungi.

Yep. Yeast. Yeasts are unicellular fungi, and certain types are some of my best friends.

I'm just not sure if I understand the language of maize mushroom. Has anyone tried it before? Can you help me translate?

Casa Bonita

Our next journey takes us to the heart of old Mexico - to one of the finest Mexican restaurants in the world - Casa Bonita.

Ok. It's in the middle of Denver, Colorado, and the food is just mediocre. My family and I just happened to grab some dinner and entertainment there this evening.

You may remember Casa Bonita from a little show called South Park:

The similarity is striking. It's almost as if Matt Stone and Trey Parker have actually been to the restaurant. Several times. Many times, in fact. Here's the scene from this evening (Nikon D70s):

And here's the scene with Cartman (and follow link to hear Cartman):

Uncanny.

Also, it looks like Cartman ordered the same thing I did : the beef deluxe dinner - all you can eat, baby! Can you guess how many tacos I ate?

But what's the point of this post? It's obviously not just going to be a shameless endorsement for the restaurant. I can't argue, Babygirl Translator and Girl Translator both love it. But that's not what this blog is about. I want to get down to the nitty gritty about the cultural phenomena that make us unique.

So, what's unique about Casa Bonita?

We ate in a cave tonight. That's unique.

And we ate food that came out of a can - with lettuce and cheese on top. The point is, you could serve yesterday's monkey shit from the zoo and kids would still flock to Casa Bonita, pulling their parents (and their wallets) behind them. It's not about the food - it's about the waterfall, the cave, and the...the...guy in a monkey suit always threatening to jump from the shadows.

The Waterfall (from whence Cartman lunged)

The point of all this, is that some time in our life we switch from an emphasis on entertainment to an emphasis on culinary perfection. We no longer need monkeys singing and dancing...we just need a nice glass of wine and a thick juicy steak. I'm not saying that I don't enjoy some dining fun with the kids, every once in a while. I'm just not sure when (or why) the culinary growing-up-switch is activated.

I just don't get it. Can you help me translate?

Howard's Translation: "Only go if you have kids. They are the only ones who understand the appeal, but prepare to roll your eyes. A lot."

Sapheyerblu's translation: "If we keep their attention placed on the divers, they won't notice how nasty the food is".