The Horse Diaper

U.S. Patent, 1998.

Returning to the language of toilets, this time we investigate horse diapers.

Tired of spending countless hours cleaning those pesky stalls? Sick of bending over to grab handfull after handfull of equine excrement? Well, fret no more!

Now you can live the lazy cowboy's dream - with the newly patented Horse Diaper (some assembly required).

Now, what do you think is more work: cleaning the floor of a stall or changing a gigantic diaper on an extremely irritated horse?

I'll stick to cleaning the floor. Heck, I'd gladly save hundreds of dollars per month on the cost of diapers if it was socially acceptable for my daughter to run free and do her business in the yard. Except that's not gonna happen. And I can't keep her in a barn.

Until she's four.

I just don't get horse diapers. Can you help me translate?

From Patently Absurd.

The Superb Lyrebird

Superb Lyrebird (Menura novaehollandiae), Australia.

We will now trek into the deepest forests of Australia, where we will attempt to translate the language of birds. Specifically, we will investigate the incredibly complex vocalizations of the Superb Lyrebird. You won't believe the sounds that this amazing creature can imitate. Watch all the way through for the most bizarre calls:

What a fascinating language. It's just unfortunate that it now includes elements of our destructive "vernacular", too.

What do you think will be the next addition to the Lyrebird's dialect?

Can you help me translate?